December 28, 2010

Post of the Year

I found this to be the most interesting post of 2010. Its by my boy Marko and I'm not just giving him props because I know him. An interesting story is behind this post. Here is a summary of what has happened, a thieving Nazi hipster apparently decided to steal this entire post on his blog. Hateful comments soon followed about Serbians and comments about Jewish people were made. Long story short authorities were reported about this fellows acts on the internet and he  soon was exposed, humiliated and confronted. He has long disappeared along with his blog.

I HATE HIPSTERS!


I was surfing over at my boy's blog over at Hell Fish Racing where he had a pretty interesting post about the good old days. He ended the post with a comment about roof racks that just reminded me just how much I hate hipsters and douchers which I commend him for. That's what lead me into my rant because those douchers he was talking about are a very particular crowd of hipsters especially common in san francisco & SoHo NYC. They tend to be 5'9'' non-threatening looking Asians or white people and even sometimes black, that are usually spotted hanging around these trendy sneaker/fashion boutique stores together where they can all feel cool cause they ride a bicycle that looks like it was designed for my grandfather with their rolled up pants/capri crop pants. You can usually pick them out in a crowd by their DSLR cameras that they have around their necks which they use to take pictures of Asian cuisine that they eat every day in an attempt to make themselves feel more cultured than you and I because they pay over charged prices for regular shit cause they work in "hip" design studios that lets them afford all this nonsense. These studios usually come with an array of Ikea furniture to make them feel even more hip cause all of their furniture has no curved lines. Also on the topic of food which I forgot to mention, they love eating with chop sticks! This is all in an attempt to make their MSG filled food feel like its more authentic than it actually is (im pretty sure Sobe life water is pretty authentic Asian cuisine) which was ever so elegantly put out there by the great maddox over at the best page in the universe. Once they are done, they have to immediately blog about it via iPhones and Macs (cause we all know that the Mac guy is a hipster as pointed out by his H&M/American Apparal clothing, and PC guy isn't so naturally they have to support their own kind) and post it along side the photos that they have of themselves "partying" at those same boutique/sneaker stores with a crowd of other assholes that look just like them holding up cups with a wannabe trendy DJ in the background playing what he perceives to be super underground classic hip hop like "ice cube and NWA" to make himself feel tough (Even though you would never catch one of them in compton, queensbridge, east new york, etc.), rebellious, and yet cooler than you at the same time for doing so. Btw..a hipster party is not a party without a section to quench your asian fetish with. They usually do this by hanging out with a token or herb version of someone from another race to make themselves feel cooler than you and I even further because they know someone dark skinned and are encouraged to take as many photos with them as possible (The darker the person you are standing next to in your photo, the more hip you are!) even though we all know that they are racist as shit deep down or just want to be accepted by fellow nerds in their hipster circle. Your not fooling anyone by thinking your cool with Asian or Black people that act like American hipsters with no real cultural know-how, cultural orientation, or even sense of heritage. All this for an attempt to quench the thirst of the hipster's Asian fetish. Along with food and different races, city skylines and shitty art galleries are a common topic for hipster photography. You may spot them at a local sports game every now and then in their blog cheering for a home team that they know nothing about by wearing a replica jersey that they just bought outside the arena that's 3 sizes too small for them with an emphasis on the architecture of the arena on their blog rather than the actual game. If that's not all bad enough, they usually wear T-shirts like "FREE TIBET" or "OBAMA: HOPE" that attempt to make them feel more aware of the world than you but in reality they only know about as much as what fox news tells them. They should all be stabbed in the fuckin neck with a gravity knife. Bless the hipster if I see one of them wearing a Kosovo related t-shirt. I would beat the holy living shit out of one if I came across one. Consider yourself warned! Fuck you hipsters! I hope H&M has a sale and you are all killed by an improvised explosive device on the way there you fuckin douchers!

No comments: